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Talk:Asonja the Dragonhog/@comment-5318678-20170225234301
Ok Saw we in the skype chat the Stream and we all thought (Well mostly I came up with the idea) to review someones character from the reviewers....and well the peeps nominated me in skype to be the one to do it. Ok So here we go. OK so I looked at the Identities section and from what I can tell these Identities are some sort of Chaos energy radiated nano machines? Am not sure what they really do for him or are these Identities supposed to be the being its self or some kind of energy race? That part could do with some explaining. Ok so his story basically paints him as a Emo type character who feels like he can't achieve anything but at the same time sees no point in achieving anything. And then it goes on to talk about his father and different thing he could really be with his parentage. So hes not a hog but he is but he's not but he has dragon blood in him. Ok so he has dragon blood....whats good about that? Whats it do for him? Does this mean hes not really a hog? If your going to give us this info please explain its if any importance it has. Because why else would you mention this. Alright next point his weight: 20 lb (9 kg) thats about the same weight as a human baby. Wow I know hes only 3,5 ft but thats way too low at least 40 lb (18 kg) for someone of his height. I have no idea what that chart is for and no one else could explain it either. We already had the personality explained but again: Lazy Emo who wants power but not willing to put the work in for it. Ok this section in personality. "He's also bisexual...but who'll care about that anyway? Bisexuals are...the bane of everyone's existence...right?" It looks like your joking here but I can't really tell plus why did you need to decorate it with christmas lights and put it in such a display. Just put something like that in the infobox no need to make a big deal of it. Ok so next bit Abilities. Smartist (When he wants to be) Unfeeling (Will do anything he wants and not really be effected by it) Can't do any sonic abilities but can fight (When he wants to) Ok so how does he fight...? His Hands, A gun, Some super nano machine powers or does his dragon blood have some importance here? And even then does he have hand to hand fighting training? He got a certain style of shooting he prefers? Details man please "He is thinking about leaving the Nimagi Freedom Fighters and become a lone wolf, or maybe work for some evil perpetrators, perhaps even a specific scientist that he seems to have a liking towards...but still has a liking toward another for past reasons." Firstly saying that jareds character there was a scientist seems very different from what I have known about the character, Secondly Why is he a scientist and what does he study and why is he with the freedom fighters? Again details would be nice. "He is known for not fighting because he's actually scared of it. When he was 4 years old when his parents and brother died by Robotnik, he refused to fight since he knew that Robotnik was too strong for him. He lost all hope and faith into himself for almost 13 years." Ok fair one some history a bit angsty but fair one. "He cuts himself occasionally if he's feeling stressed but he doesn't show it in front of everyone. He disguises it as an accident or hides it completely. The more he feels depressed, the bigger the scar that will be visible." There goes that precious Dragon blood.. Am not even gonna comment fully on this as I find the idea of people doing this in real life extremely stupid. "He shows no expression and barely goes outside of his apartment as he believes everyone will criticize him when he leaves. He does live in a huge city where crime usually happens." Now he lives in a city and is emo as hell any importance in these details? "He wishes so very hard to become a giant as he wants to experience the feeling of ripping buildings apart, and kicking cars and trucks into the buildings. He theorizes it is an "exhilarating trip, much more than a roller-coaster in a kiddie park." Or you could just give him a copy of the game hatred and let him go nuts. About 13 doll maker pics one of him red nothing mentioned in the profile what thats about, The Artist drawings are nice though. His overall design of being a hedgehog I find far too common but thats a comment many people probably already told you, The Black with more Black on top of black well I can see the extreme attempt of Goth Meets Emo look. Ok that stats system to me is flawed not why is Agility dexterity and evasiveness all in it if they all pretty much cover the same skill and skill is even a stat as well also they are far too low I get hes ment to be lazy & weak but man give the character some credit unless hes riddiculed with disease he would not have stats that low. Right so next bit is Powers, Why oh why is that down here with the stats after Occupation and artwork and not with the abilities section also now we see how he fight he can create weapons, cool but he has a limited energy pool or he dies, that I can get but that should also be in the weakness section...Speaking of that. He's motion sick ok more a flaw than anything but could be exploited, Can manipulate the enviroment to make traps (Again abilities section) and scientific knowledge in Physics, chemistry and trigonometry so he can predict projectiles coming at him and would be able to use it offensively if he was firing back at people, also he is very fearful well that certainly doesn't help him. Ok we're at the end I will say this he has a super form but its not mentioned, listed or said why he has one, And hes autistic well thats a very big area to cover but how bad is his autism does it effect him majorly or is it more an inconvienace? Am not gonna drop a number rating as I feel thats just a dumb way to review a character. But I'd say he got some good Potential as a character but I think he needs a profile tidy up and a rethinking on that stat system with some more detail explaining in areas. I'd say more on his design being edgy but I think we get that by now. All in all it sounds like you have some work to do but I like what your trying to do with him. Not Bad.